Ellen Page, Hard Candy

Haily:

- Who?!!
- The Pedophiles!
- “She was so sexy, she was asking for it!”, “She was only technically a girl. She acted like a woman”.
- It’s just so easy to blame a kid, isn’t it?
- Just because a girl knows how to imitate a woman, doesn’t mean she’s ready to do what a woman does.
- I mean you’re the grown-up here.
- If a kid is experimenting and says something flirtatious, you ignore it. You don’t encourage it.
- If a kid says, “Hey, let’s make a screwdrivers”, You take the alcohol away and you don’t race them to the next drink!.

It’s a MUST to see movie, 10/10.

April: But I don’t, and I hate you, you are just some boy who made me laugh at a party once, infact if you come any closer. if you touched or anything, I think I’ll scream.

SHE SCREAMS
April: What are you gonna do now, are you gonna hit me, to show me how much you love me.

Frank: Don’t worry, I can’t be bothered, you are not worth the trouble to hit you, you are empty, empty
hollow shallow woman. I mean, what the hell are you doing in my house if you hate so much, why the hell are you married to me, what the hell you are doing carrying my child, why you have not just get rid of him when you had a chance, cause listen to me, listen to me, I got news for you, I wish that god that you had.

Great monologue of Revolutionary Road – the movie

The irony is everyone is telling me it’s good, you should do that from the 1st place, but if it’s that good why they didn’t go there.

It’s not like I had a choice, it’s mostly I have no choice except facing this experience, it’s just 1.5 year!, right? what could happen there!.

I don’t know!, but I’m going through feelings, like time is going so fast that I couldn’t do what I always wanted, but in the same time, I feel life is going deadly slow, that I just want to forward it to the point where I pack my stuff and go.

It’s hard here, I feel like it’s not my place, the community is built over different values of me, whether in love, in friendship or work!, it’s hard, it’s so complicated.

When I sit next to her, everything fades away!, wouldn’t be nice if all my life is about sitting next to her?, I don’t know why I love her, she just makes me feel quiet and peace, all the voices in my head settle and every things becomes clear, inside me I feel happy, I love life with her, she is life, yet I hate her lifestyle!.

She is with very shallow mind, reckless girl, she loves her self so much, she takes hours painting her little tiny foot fingers with roses and mini bright stars!, she likes to smoke like a machine!, yet she is so careful in which soap she should use for her skin!, everything is simple for her, she loves categorizing people, she has a buzzy voice, noisy and messy girl, she brings chaos where ever she goes, but I feel it’s like she brings colors to my life!.

But is this enough to love!, day after day I realize it’s us who we make love, feelings and emotions, it’s just we attach this chemical reactions to the sweetest person we imagine ourselves with.

How silly of me to try defining such a thing called love!, like I know everything.

Ahhhh, my moods today become positive and negative rapidly, I think it’s related to the March’s season, this spring, windy sunny rainy cloudy weather!, the month when I was born!.

God!, it’s been 25 years ago where I cried for the 1st time!, and I still wanna cry!, crying out loud, shame on me, men don’t cry, right?, well fuck them, I want to cry.

Maybe it’s a small desire reflected by the silent anger that is growing and growing, oh you don’t wanna know about this

It’s so khara to feel yourself blocked from inside out!, is it illusion to feel your inner self is so giant and so powerful, but from outside, you can’t translate this into real actions.

And what about Identity crisis too, shit this is the most pain in the ass problem with me, where is my fucking Identity?!.

Anyhow, I’m fully determine in smashing all the obstacles, just to see where this is going, I just want to know how every thing will end, I hope my end is good.

Enough practicing my English for today.

I’ve met an old friend of mine yesterday, it’s been over two years since I saw him, it’s great to have such a great friends, I knew him since I was 14 [I feel I'm using the word since too much].

What I’m proud of my friend is all of them are honest, I don’t feel uncomfortable with them, I can say whatever I want whenever I want without the fear to be judged.

We had discussed many things, the future is the most of my fears, he wants to immigrate, the argument was about our professions, I told him I want to try my luck here before heading to far away place, my profession which is banks and insurance is so new to the country, it’s been 6 years only for the 1st private bank, maybe for him the situation is different, but for me I want to try my luck before going out.

I wish the luck for all my friends, I love them, and I’m so proud of them, weather they are here, or at some place far far away, they are all hardworking men and promising for a better future.

Weather it’s a good passion or not, people take an attitude immediately to those people who have a passion, either they accept them and start  seeking their attention, or they refuse them at the moment.

My Passion is to jump over the shore, source: Dreams, flicker.

As an Example, people who have a passion of Metallic music, they have a known pattern of lifestyle, not to mention you can recognize them from the way they dress.

So what is my passion?, what is that thing which makes me unique from others, what kind of music I love, movies and books?.

I always tried to define my passion, but I always fail to reach the level of making it a life style, or let’s say a permanent way of life, I feel bored immediately from doing the same thing every day, so I let it go.

What is my passion, neutralism is driving me crazy, I want to take a side.

But wait, I’m totally convinced that there is nothing perfect, I mean I can’t have a passion of a singer cause not all his/her songs are worth to listen, having a passion of one kind lifestyle cancel the opportunity of  having experience of others, frankly I get annoyed from those who talk about their one life style passion as if it’s the hidden paradise.

So what is my passion?
I have a passion Action, life and new ideas, I love that music which makes all my cells dancing, maybe electronic music or just ordinary one, but with a fast rhythm, a permanent change of the tempo.

I have a passion of high places, cause it generates a lot of fear inside me, so my adrenaline released in my body and I can feel my heart is beating, I love life, healthy life with all the meaning of the word, I love extreme sports, I’d like to climb a rocky mountain with pillar angle, and I believe I will pee in my pants since I will feel so frightened.

I have a passion of  rally events, and the scene of mud covering all the car while it’s going to the maximum speed leaving behind a total mess,  or wearing those heavy gloves and hard helmet driving on desert road, while the sands hit every corner of it.

I have a passion of skiing on ice, and I’d like just for  once to hear the sound of skiing while thick air stings my chicks, I want punji jump [Not sure I spell it right], where I see the land closing and closing so I do my last prayer in my heart, and at the last moment the rob polls me up again, it’s like you being born again.

I have a passion in playing in mud hole, jumping in it, messing with the substance that we were created from, or for sure we will be buried in it some day.

I have a passion of driving a motor cycle, driving it to the maximum speed toward the horizon with a sunset scene, at old deserted rural road, and olive trees planted all over its sides, at a spring time, long, long road, without an end, hearing the sound of motor while changing the gears, and my sweetheart embraces me from behind.

I have a passion with the food that requires you to dip in, a food with all colors, meat, tomatoes salad and hot chili, crunchy bread, and yogurt, a food where all the family gather around, and I hate to eat alone, and If it happens, I don’t enjoy the food to the level I forgot what I just already ate.

I have a passion with pain!! No, not sadistic pain, I don’t like to cause pain to my self or to anyone, and I can’t  stand the scene of blood, but I mean If it happened that I was in pain, I try to enjoy it, a pain which drive me to sleep, and believe me, the pain I’m talking about is not just physical pain, it’s more like suffer to pain.

I have a passion of all what I mentioned, even though I don’t follow the news updates of what I said, and even I don’t know one single name of famous people related to my passion, I don’t have a posters also, and I don’t know If I will ever have the chance to experience what I mentioned, it’s like that great Pepsi advertisement, about doing things before going to 30.

I’m listening to a very loud song for Evanescence, next I will listen to my Fairuz [Legendary Classic Arab singer], I hate to tie my self with one kind pattern, it’s me and this is my life, I have big dreams, and for now I hardly can reach simplest one of them.

Maybe I have a passion of life, isn’t that enough?, what about you? What is your dreams? Your passion?.

Psst: If you have a great English skills, or you are a native speaker, please help me to improve my English, Append your suggestion and correction to your comment, I will be happy to improve my English with you.

This Post is available in Arabic at here.

The fact of Palestine is not by History and Documents, it’s not by Agreements and treaties, the fact of Palestine is by self-sacrifice of a Palestinian to liberate his humanity, that crucial moment when a Palestinian with rocks in his hand standing face to face with Occupation soldiers, ready to defend his land and dignity, making himself a human shield for his brothers and sisters, doesn’t care in bullets of hate and spite.

This is the fact of Palestine, which says it’s ours, cause no one deserve a land if he is not ready to die for, Israeli never die for his land, cause he fear death, he doesn’t acknowledge martyrdom, cause he die while trying to kill Palestinians, while the Palestinians die while trying to liberate themselves from occupation.

The main success that Israel was able to achieve till now, is the victory in mining the Arab world and Muslims with a lot of hate and spite to her, and she enjoy doing this.

The explosion moment is nearby, the moment where all these hate and spite that been planted by Israel itself will burn everything by her name, it’s like Israel can’t live without holocausts, she can’t pass over the history and make a new day, a new future, so If she wasn’t in the holocaust, she make a new one after one to the Palestinian people, it’s like these holocaust she made feed her emotions, her life, her twisted mind.

Palestine you are ours, not cause of AQSA neither of Grandfathers blood which blend with olive trees, Palestine you are ours, cause you are ours, nothing more, so simple.

A sixty years of tyranny and injustice, still the resistance is existed, a resistance of youth who look for a better tomorrow, a resistance of youth who fight for peace, for freedom, for safe.

A lot of people started to feel weak, and fear to support the resistance, saying how can you defeat Israel, it’s like a bird fighting huge angry bull.

The resistance may knew she can’t defeat Israel alone, but she is not just fighting only the occupation, she fights our silence, chasing our conscious which decided to hide fearing the terrorism of Zionists.

Viva Palestine, Viva Resistance.

This post is in solidarity with blogging about Palestine day event.

Read it in Arabic!.

I tried to write more than once, and each time, the post end in recycle bin, I checked what other bloggers said about mentioning their defects, most of them was cute and funny, they were not a real defect, they were most like personality description, maybe good for some, and bad for others, it’s a relative issue.

I believe that defect must be against community idealist values to be a real defect, and in that case, it takes a lot of courage to divulge it, the purpose to divulge a defect is to give people a chance to know that others share the same problem, they suffer what you suffer, and there is a solution for it.

This point is what I want to discuss, are we as Arabic Bloggers able to divulge our defects to our community?, without being judged, or being analyzed based on your defects.

I can write down one hundred defect in my personality, some take it good, other take it bad, but it won’t be a real one, cause if I listed my real defects, I would be judged by one of our community’s naïves, those who have more than I do in defects, yet they can’t see the purpose of mentioning your real problems, instead they prefer to judge you and deny the existence of these problems in the community.

Lately I was reading for Mohammad Omar [Arabic], a Jordanian blogger who is married and has two daughters, one of them is in my age (20′s), when reading for him, you feel like you are reading something real, something has a value, a life experience, his great frankness with himself, and publishing what he went through of life’s problem, or what real defects has in his personality, is an important attempt to nudge the reader and motivate him to take some lessons of his life.

Soon he was been judged, his public image was sabotaged and distort by angry comments, then he was forced to delete one of the best of his posts, which contain a lot of life experiences, and wisdoms, just because of those naives, behind their screens, couldn’t handle that much of opening, that much of frankness, so they fight it, by judging and mocking.

We never reached that level of awareness, which make the reader able to see the purpose of a subject, instead we focus on special words and statements. I have read while ago, a post talking about sexual energy drinks, the post never contained a “sexual” word nor ” penis”, in fact when the paragraph contained “penis” word, it was listed in English, instead of Arabic? Why? Cause the author knew, that his reader will focus only in these words, and they will never see the purpose of the article, which reminds me on a post [Arabic] talking about, why Arabs use English to express such embarrassing subjects?.

If we asked a blogger to write about his experience with pornographic sites, why? And when he use it? How his resistance fail to reject these sites?, you will find a huge rejection for such a subject, even the article won’t be on pornographic descriptions, it will analysis why and when his ability fail to resist his desires.

First one to reject such a subject will be unfortunately is me!, cause I’m not that brave to face my community’s judgments, yet.

Even if someone did it, you will sudden see all the people became angles!!, no one ever seen pornographic sites!!, and they turn against him, judging him, or start giving him idealist ideas!!, no one listen, no one acknowledge that he suffers the same issue, no one at all, which will lead to picture that man as an alien, sick, and non of human been is like him, then issue is ignored, and the solution too as a result.

On the same pattern, we can check the frankness of the whole community, I mean have you ever wondered, If we are all against and I mean all of us, against dirty songs channels, and we have already read many, many article about fighting them, yet, they are here, and their business is flourishing, Oh god people, focus a little, who are the customers?!, think a little, you will find out that both major producers represent two tends, an Islamic and Nationalist (Rotana from Saudi Arabia, Melody from Egypt), I wonder what is the common element between them? Aha, the same customers, same people who hate these channels, in public they fight it, but in home they watch it, and support it.

Anyway, why I’m so angry about nothing!!, I’m not different, so I will do the tag as other bloggers did:

• I hate coffee.
• I hate waking up early morning especially for 8.00 am lectures.
• I get angry easily.
• I get calm easily.
• And I love Rola Saad (Arab singer, use her body as temptation) [Shame on me].

Finally, as always, check out the Arabic version of this article, one language is not enough anymore, you should consider learning Arabic.

The story begins with me knowing about the new movie at Cham Cinema, I got excited especially the midterm exam is ahead, and I thought about a little entertaining myself won’t hurt anyone.

My friend, Alaa, who is my best friend, and like a brother for me, who is running a telecom shop at Aljameelia where his brothers help him, and he likes going to cinema like me, plus, Catherine Zitta jones is the favorite actor for me and him, so I suggested going there.

Well my Friend Alaa, while he is working, you feel like he is a mobile radar station, he answers the phone, takes care of a customer, and works on his pc all in one…amazing, isn’t!?.

Later, I discovered that he focuses on one thing only , and follow the others by such a words like: humm, Ahaa, yeah, yes I’m listening…etc, which is an automated words, nothing more.

At that moment, I asked him: would you like going to cinema, Legend of Zorro?, with Catherine is there, at Cham Cinema.

Alaa: Ahaa, yeah, sure.

At home, he called me again, and said:

• What did you asked me at shop?!.
• Ahhh, man, where were you when I asked you.
• He said: you always ask me when I’m busy, now tell me, what was about it.
• I said: Would you like going to cinema, legend of Zorro?.
• He answers: Hummm, you know what, I’m not in the mood for that.
• Ok, as you wish.

After two days, he calls me again:

• Hay Ali, would you like going to cinema?
• Me: yeah, sure, what is the movie about.
• He: Legend of Zorro, with Catherine Zitta Jones.
• Me: wow man, I asked you about it 2 days ago, what’s wrong with you.
• He: Ah, yeah, but today, Accad Institution is going there, I thought about going out with them.
• Me: Is there any hot chicks.
• He: 50/50.
• Me: Ok then, lets meet at 3:30 pm, I will wait for you.

I was there exactly at 3:30 pm, he got late, so I said, it’s ok, his home is nearby, no need to worry, but let me give him a call:

• Hay Alaa, how you do?, where are you now?.
• I’m at the “Koora” roundabout [Famous spot of Aleppo].
• Then it’s less than a minute and you will be here.

Then it’s a minute, two, three, then I called him again:

• Where the hell are you?.
• He: I’m inside the Cinema now!!.
• What, I didn’t see coming inside, wait, I’m outside, I’m coming for you.

I went there, and still can’t find him, then he called me:

• He said: Where are you Aliiiii, [While he is talking I was hearing the voices of a movie, then I knew what happened].
• I asked him: Which Cinema you are in?.
• He said: Cinema Halab.

My friend Alaa, forgot to tell me which cinema since we never expected that Cinema Cham and Halab are rolling the same movie at the same time.

I watched the movie alone, seeing all the guys with their friends, and since Cinema Halab is ahead ten minutes, Alaa finished the movie and called me, to tell me the end, and spoil the movie for me.

I learned that day, whenever calling on cell phone, the golden words are: Where, and Where, then When

Check out the Arabic version of this post, read it, discover it, enjoy.